*****
Vote For Your Local Woman
The whole thing has led me to one sad conclusion – men are
not temperamentally suited for politics. Let’s face it, men have never really
been good at getting things done. We’ll start a lot of things, but how many do
we actually finish?
The part of politics that involves strutting around and
making promises we don’t intend to remember let alone keep, that part we’re
good at. We’re also good at standing in the Commons or Legislature and
insulting other men, and then challenging them to say it outside. Photo-ops, self-congratulatory
speeches, we’ve got that covered. In short, any of the peacock-type aspects of
politics, men are your man, so to speak.
But if you want anything of substance done, we all know you
have to give it to a woman. If it is difficult, dirty and thankless, a woman is
your man. And if it’s a question of judgment, my money is on the opposite sex
any day of the week.
And back to the topic of sex, I bet we’d have a lot fewer
sex scandals in politics if women ran the show. Can you imagine Margaret Thatcher
with a boy toy, or Indira Gandhi? Do you think Hillary would have been caught
with a frowsy political aide in the Oval office like husband Bill Clinton? Most
of the time men have one thing on their mind – two if it is dinnertime. In
spite of movies like “Sex in the City”, most women of my acquaintance
unfortunately are not consumed 24 hours a day with thoughts of a frisky nature.
Now, I know a woman was involved in the current “Mad Max”
scandal, but no one is questioning her judgment. Okay – maybe dating a
Conservative cabinet minister doesn’t show the best taste, but secret
government documents weren’t the kind of political briefs at the heart of her
relationship.
I think women politicians would also be less likely to
forget sensitive documents and leave them lying around. Women know where things
are and where to find them in any household, and since men are lacking in their
domestic duties, it’s unlikely we’ll find any lost items while cleaning.
One thing is for sure, women also have a clearer sense of
what is actually needed. I have no doubt that a government run by women would
solve more of our social problems in a month than the last ten governments
combined. You can bet that the healthcare and education crises would be fixed,
and we’d have a national system of daycare by next Thursday at the latest.
Corruption in high places? Not in a female government. Once
you take sex and booze out of the equation, I think you’ll find that drops off
too. High priced travel junkets? Not going to happen. When was the last time a
woman took a selfish vacation when everyone catered to her instead of her
ending up in a kitchenette in another country?
The justice system would be cleaned up in a hurry as well. I
think most families were like mine – if you had to confess to some minor
infraction, you tried to get dad to deal with it before mom found out. No one
liked to face the wrath of mom. She could have run on a law and order ticket.
The problem is getting men to vote for someone who is that
good for us.
© Stephen Lautens 2008
